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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27663407">hear the hum</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/irrationalqueer/pseuds/irrationalqueer'>irrationalqueer</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>hear the hum [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/F, female dnp, wlw</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 22:27:29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>917</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27663407</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/irrationalqueer/pseuds/irrationalqueer</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Dani sighs, knocking on the door instead of fumbling for her key and leaning her forehead on the jamb. She’s shivering a little bit in her short skirt, and when she swipes a hand under her eyes, her skin feels stiff and tacky from dried tears.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Dan Howell/Phil Lester</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>hear the hum [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2039494</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>35</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>hear the hum</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Dani sighs, knocking on the door instead of fumbling for her key and leaning her forehead on the jamb. She’s shivering a little bit in her short skirt, and when she swipes a hand under her eyes, her skin feels stiff and tacky from dried tears. Fiona doesn’t keep her waiting for long; she’s stood there for just a couple minutes before the door is opening, Fiona squinting blearily at her, hair a disaster and oversized sleep shirt hanging off one shoulder.</p><p>“Dani?” Fiona croaks, reaching out for her and misjudging the distance between them. She smacks her hand uselessly against Dani’s collarbone and Dani snorts despite herself, reaching up to grab her hand before it can do any further damage. </p><p>“Yeah,” she says. “Can I come in?”</p><p>Fiona moves aside and Dani walks in, kicking her boots off and dropping her coat on the floor. She hears Fiona locking the door and then warm hands are on her hips, guiding her gently toward the bedroom. Dani turns to face her, sighing when Fiona reaches up to cup her face, swiping her thumb under her eye. </p><p>“What happened, Dani?” Fiona asks, eyes wide and sad. This isn’t the first time Dani’s showed up at Fiona’s flat in the middle of the night, but it’s been awhile, and she tries not to come over after parties anymore. Fiona just always looks so sad when Dani’s tipsy and makeup-stained and a little slutty. It’s not worth the look on her face most of the time. Now, Dani just shrugs, avoiding eye contact. </p><p>Fiona sighs, kissing her gently on the forehead and stepping away to the closet. Dani yanks her top off and pulls down her skirt, entirely uncaring. Fiona’s good anyway; she won’t look. She never looks unless Dani asks her to. They’re - not girlfriends, but they’re not just friends, either. Sometimes those lines are blurrier than they should be. Sometimes Dani’s too scared of what it might mean, her being in love with a girl. Sometimes she has to get out of her head, getting drunk or spending all night dancing or hooking up with random guys from her halls. </p><p>None of it ever feels as good as this does: the blush on Fiona’s face as she pointedly doesn’t look at Dani, handing her a pair of sweats and a pajama top. The warmth of Fiona’s flat, thawing her out even though she’s naked from the waist up and her underwear don’t leave much to the imagination. The sure knowledge that she can come here if she needs to - she has her own key, even. Fiona wants to share that space with her. She pulls on the pajamas and crawls into the bed, scooting all the way over toward the wall and staring at Fiona. </p><p>Fiona just stares back; she probably can’t see much anyway without her glasses, but it feels like she can see right through Dani anyway. She won’t ask exactly what Dani did tonight - it’s obvious anyway, with the smeared makeup and the tears and the way she probably smells like alcohol and smoke. Dani will tell her anyway in the morning. They’re not girlfriends but they’re more than friends and Dani would be stupid to pretend that Fiona doesn’t mean as much to her as she does. She wants Fiona to know her in a bone-deep, undeniable, raw way that terrifies her, and she’s incapable of fully giving herself up to it. </p><p>But she can tell her that she went to a party with some girl in her halls and she’d had exactly three drinks that she’d made herself, malibu and cranberry juice, and she’d smoked four cigarettes even though she knew Fiona would tut at her if she’d seen. She’d hooked up with a boy she didn’t even know the name of, let him kiss her and touch her until she couldn’t pretend she didn’t feel the restless crawling under her skin any longer and had to stumble away, pretending she was going to vomit. And then she’d walked the three miles to Fiona’s flat. </p><p>It feels like there’s something rising up inside her; like it has been for the last year. Everytime she kisses Fiona, holds her in bed, touches her skin, she feels it. There’s a wave of something and it started in the pit of her stomach and it’s in her throat, now, and she feels like at some point she’s going to open her mouth and it’ll spill out and all of her lines will just dissolve. For now, Fiona’s getting into the bed with her, sliding close to her and pushing her hair behind her ear. She leans in and kisses her, soft lips parting just slightly, sighing in that way she does every time she kisses Dani, like a sigh of relief. She feels it rising up but she just - pushes it away for now. </p><p>All Dani has to do here is kiss Fiona back, let herself sink into the soft mattress and into Fiona’s arms. She doesn't have to let it out right now - not when she’s probably still tipsy, and she’s exhausted, and Fiona’s confused. She can just - let herself have this for now, Fiona’s hand pulling her closer by the small of her back, kissing her so so softly like she’s afraid of scaring Dani off. Dani doesn’t know how to tell her that’s impossible, so she just - kisses her back until they’re too tired to keep kissing and then rests their foreheads together.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i’ve no idea what this is but! here we are!</p><p>thx to keelin 4 the vibe check!</p><p>name from 3 rounds and a sound by blind pilot (this wasn’t inspired by the song exactly but i think it’s p fitting so maybe. give it a listen if you want idk)</p><p>find me on tumblr @irrationalqueer.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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